Inertia Creeps... And I Yell at It to "Slow Down, You Damned Kids!"

I want you to imagine a witty, nay, a side-splitting post on a timely topic below. I would write one, but I'm a bit busy at the moment. By "busy," I mean I am battling some fierce torpor. By "battling," I mean I'm laying on the couch thinking about how, uh, torpid my life has become.

Anyway, I'm making like a sloth trying to struggle from a tar pit. It's neither pretty nor entertaining. In fact, it's a bit embarrassing, so, again, please imagine that I've just written you some prose gold. In the meantime, I will try to stay off the couch and, who knows, eventually provide the real thing. Well, perhaps not gold (I don't have any of that) but at least some well-used copper.